Sex, Taking All Comers
Sex, Taking All Comers / Ivan Garcia
Posted on May 19, 2013
There is still the ration book. Potatoes are scarce, the price of fruit
is going through the roof, and drinking a natural orange juice is a
luxury. Sanitary pads are only distributed every two months — a package
of ten to menstruating women. And connecting to the Internet is still a
science fiction story for a large part of the population.
However, sex is liberated. A national sport. According to some, the
infidelity between couples is a gene human beings carry. If those verse
in it give a tour of Cuba, we can confirm their strange theories.
And they confirm that teenagers of 12 and 13 are “experts” in the field.
Unaware that Australian is a continent, or that Henry Lee was in
independence fighter in the American Revolution and not the creator of
Lee jeans. But when it comes to sex, they have countless stories to
tell. For many boys, their fathers teach them from the time they’re
small, that the more women they have the more macho they are.
It’s the ABCs of a Cuban father to his son; life is dick. Men don’t cry.
And the boss of the house is the one with balls. If in the 19th and 20th
century fathers paid prostitutes to de-flower their sons, today it’s not
Most children are more up-to-date and more promiscuous than their
parents. Having a “honey” or a lover is synonymous with masculinity. An
athlete of sex. A son of a bitch of the street.
The more lovers, the more drinks friends pay for. In the bars they offer
“wise” council about how to get into an impossible female. For hours,
they tell sex anecdotes without ceasing to drink like Cossacks, beer and
Sex in Cuba is messy, but it has its hierarchies. Not like the
neighborhood pimp that manages a five-star hotel. A capital that’s a
general. A boring and monotonous deputy to parliament that’s a mandarin.
The “honeys” of the superiors respect them. Secretly they look at their
breasts or butt, but desist from the rude compliment or indecent
proposal. A boss can fire you or make your life impossible if he finds
you prowling around his woman.
Meanwhile, the more stars on your epaulette or if your photo appears
among the members of the Central Committee, the more chances you have to
give major luxuries to your lovers. You can even choose: blondes
brunettes, mulatto or black. Or have a collection with one of each. As
all are stunning, with pride and discretion we see you on the weekend in
exclusive recreational villas for senior officers, or at parties their
wives don’t attend.
Being the “honey” of a major character in Cuba, is synonymous with
social status. As if rocket-propelled, you climb the ladder at work. All
over Havana everyone is talking about the meteoric rise of a famous
television report, who is both beautiful and talented. According to the
rumors, the lucky guy who sleeps with her is the “boss of the bosses.”
It’s still remembered that in the 90s, when Carlos Aldana was the third
strong man on the island, in charge of the ideological sector of the
Communist Party, came to have three “darling” journalists, the three
Even Fidel Castro, between sips of Jack’s Daniel, liked to talk in
private about his sexual exploits, like the affair he had with the
German Marita Lorenz and she told about it in a book. In a
macho-Fidelista Revolution like the Cuban one, having amorous adventures
in bulk sets you apart from the pack. A rogue, a pimp. A hallmark of
virility that makes the difference.
In a note from Juan Juan Almeida published in Marti News, told about the
debauchery of Cuban officials in Angola. He gave a figure, taking from
the Ministry of the Armed Forces: 40% of the woman who were on the
mission in Angola were harassed or raped. That figure has never appeared
in the newspaper Granma. For me, Almeida Jr. is a highly credible
source. He lived among the creme de la creme of the Cuban hierarchy. His
father, a great person in the opinion of his relatives, took to his bed
every woman who stirred his pleasure.
And I pardon their children and wives. The great difference between
being the “honey” of a leader and dying of hunger, are luxuries and
comforts. The guy with few resources invites you to a movie and buys you
popcorn or peanuts. The “bigwig” puts a roof over your head. And if you
really satisfy him he buys you a car. And in addition, you climb the
ladder in your profession.
There are women who live off their lovers, like the pimps off their
prostitutes. And sometimes they have more than one “girlfriend,” they
compete to see who gets more and remains preferred. Recently I heard an
argument between two hookers. One said to the other, “Yeah, I’m a
monster, I bought my boyfriend a motorcycle and three gold chains. The
others just give him shirts and sneakers.”
You can live in tile house in Carraguao, or a residence in Miramar. But
if you were raised to it, you have to have a “honey.” In a conversation
between “tough men,” if you don’t talk about the “girlfriends,” “honeys”
or lovers you have, they might label you Catholic or retarded. A bore
who doesn’t know how to use the penis God gave you. That is, taking care
not to mention or even look at the boss’s lover.
16 May 2013
Source: “Cuba: Sex, Taking All Comers / Ivan Garcia | Translating Cuba”